She began to loose hope in herself. Fear had become such a huge part of her life in this particular category that it sickened her. She didn’t want to be afraid, but when she got on stage to sing she choked. It appeared as though she couldn’t sing at all. But place her in the shower, or during a workout, or at the supermarket and her voice sounded astonishing. If she was at the supermarket people would smile and say “wow you have a beautiful voice.” If she was at walmart, someone would tap her shoulder and say “You belong on american idol.” If she was at work and just taking care of her patient as she did a dressing change (she is a nurse) and just singing a small lullaby , her patient would say “ur a wonderful nurse but girl u picked the wrong career, you need to be onstage somewhere.”
But put her onstage to sing, and she was a shipwreck. Her hands would shake and get sweaty, she would feel dizzy, her throat closed up, tears welled up in her eyes and her stomach hurt so bad. it is at those moments that she dreaded being a singer. but in all honesty, singing was the only thing that kept her afloat, made her feel alive and that life was bearable. So she challenged herself. She began to sing more and anywhere. Even when she didn’t feel like it, She stopped hiding in the shadows of always being a back up singer and began to step forth for solo’s. But it wasn’t easy because there were moments when she cried right before shows and told herself….. “but i know i can sing!, i just have to get through tonight, i just have to sing this song, no ad-libs, just sing!”
That girl is me, Dana. This is for those that have been rejected and told that they weren’t talented. The people that allowed fear to make them hostage and cripple their gift. those that gave up on themselves but at some point knew that they had to get back up and fight because their gift would just go to waste. Sometimes people like this or like me just need hope and a place for encouragement/growth. This is the place.